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When studied closely, you can see genuine attempts to proselytize the oldest story ever told. That's right, Huckleberry Finn... at least I think that's what book it is. I always heard "The Good Book" and that one's ok, I guess.
Hooker & Blow
BJesus loves you! He died to pay for your sins so that you can be forgiven and be free! You are never too far away to be redeemed, whoever calls on the name of the Lord will be saved! God gives true peace and healing, and in him you find security both in your identity and in death. Seek God, he is calling out to you! ♥️
OCWeird, he came to me and said something like "Hookers and blow my son, hookers and blow... And bungee jumping is awesome! One of my many failures as a deity was not having man invent it before he skewered me."- OCSell your crazy somewhere else Reagan, we're all stocked up here!!!
- BGod does not tolerate being mocked friend, I pray you repent and seek his forgiveness (which is always open to you until death) before your day of judgment
- OCOh for fucks sakes! You wackos are relentless with this crap. I've never been one to hedge my bets, so your bullshit falls on deaf ears. I don't seek out religious people to tell them that they are deranged. I have never put a gun to someone's head to buy my art. Yet here you are, threatening me with your forgiving gods wrath and/or praying for my fucking soul, like the many that have come before you and couldn't take the hint at "sell your crazy somewhere else." I get so many of these that this is literally a copy and paste response!
- BThat makes my heart glad that you are blessed with the many reminders he is sending you. Until the moment we die God sends people and events to remind us of our standing in his universe. And yes, he redeems all who turn to him through his forgiveness that none of us deserve. Death finalizes our faith or our rejection. And friend, do you not think you would have people come to you when you mock the Lord so openly?
- BDespite everything you and I have done the same Jesus you mock died for us. The Bible says before the earth was formed he (God) knew us and loved us. He will never give up on you friend, until the moment you die he will continue to send the intervention of his love because he truly desires that you not chose eternal separation. All has been forgiven in the sacrifice of Christ, all you need do is repent and believe. This is my prayer, that every person who reaches out to you would remind you of his love. That every time you make a cross you would be reminded of what took place on it in love for you.
- OCYour delusion is not my reality, nor will it ever be, regardless of your persistence in badgering me. That being said (and I mean this in the kindest way possible) please, please, please... Fuck Off!
- BNine months have passed, and I still pray for you along with many others. “For “Everyone who calls on the name of the Lord will be saved.”“ Romans 10:13 NLT
- BYou told me last June that I believed in a delusion and it wasn’t your reality. It takes more faith to disbelieve God than to rest in his peace. We can’t create realities, we can only embrace or reject truth. Jesus is still reaching out to you
- BAnd I pray now as I have that you will turn to him and be reconciled with him 🤍
- BThere is no assurance of your place after death except in the blood of Christ shed for you in love. He promises we will be with him and every one of his promises come to fruition.
- B”If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness.“ 1 John 1:9 NIV
- B”For you know that God paid a ransom to save you from the empty life you inherited from your ancestors. And it was not paid with mere gold or silver, which lose their value. It was the precious blood of Christ, the sinless, spotless Lamb of God. God chose him as your ransom long before the world began, but now in these last days he has been revealed for your sake. Through Christ you have come to trust in God. And you have placed your faith and hope in God because he raised Christ from the dead and gave him great glory. You were cleansed from your sins when you obeyed the truth, so now you must show sincere love to each other as brothers and sisters. Love each other deeply with all your heart. For you have been born again, but not to a life that will quickly end. Your new life will last forever because it comes from the eternal, living word of God. As the Scriptures say, “People are like grass; their beauty is like a flower in the field. The grass withers and the flower fades. But the word of the Lord remains forever.” And that word is the Good News that was preached to you.“ 1 Peter 1:18-25 NLT
- BAnd I pray that you will see him everywhere you turn. He loves you more than you will ever know, and he will forgive you if you ask.
- BMay your days begin and end with the peace of God. This is my hope and prayer in Christ Jesus for you.
- OCThis one time awhile ago, I contracted gonorrhea. I waited WAY TO LONG to go to the doctor and it got REALLY BAD! My dick looked like the chick on "The Exorcists" puking pea soup everywhere. It even spread to my asshole and caused itching so bad that I wanted to ram a rat tail file up my ass.
- OCI only tell you this now because I want you to get a very clear understanding of where I am coming from...
- OCI did not read much of what you just decided to proselytize my way, and nor will I. In fact, I would re-live my entire gonorrhea experience until the day I die if it meant that I wouldn't be exposed to even another word of your mindless drivel
Tourettes
- TDisgusting!
- OCTourette's of the keyboard again? Here, I'll play along, just so you feel included... Judgmental!
- TYep! Sure am judging you. You will be judged in the end too. This is likely just a display of your incompetence of Gods word. I pray you discover a deeper purpose with Gods help
- OCOh no, I've never though about it like th.. HYPOCRISY (sorry, I think I caught your tourettes). Isn't there something in a book somewhere about "judge not lest ye be judged"? (Matthew 7:1) Ooo ooo ooo, there was something else in that same book about sinners casting stones (John 8:7) and since obviously your all about doing your God's job for him, why not take that lack of cognitive dissonance to the next level? Brace yourself for the ultimate in casting stones technology...
- T(Dramatic pause for affect)
More Hooker & Blow
Official Report
- Tanya Tuktherpeen initiated a conversation on February 2023 stating: mf9 Jesus still loves you tD CNXoQane g Z U5ndrX CMY V5di wMO d 7 KO OrIqs RF 6 sk ogJND f Fc mSH 6yq6 N N TssYdu 4T O1XX iO oa R mK 7nw r R8 Q oWS5 U KA JOiO x M GF Y2 w jZ z
- A. Heathen cleaned the hoof marks off their cheeks and screamed: Dc Don't you think it is awful presumptuous of you to assume that you speak for Jesus? DAq WN D SZE z Se IRbQ 9aKJxzYY Stu6c yz 4K hnmR AY7 t BE Bi P zx E e J mN EuJZy 5x WG AI pgwJ
- Unexpectedly, Tanya Tuktherpeen cracked wise: God loved us so much. He sent his one and only son to die for us 🤍 That is more than words friend kT t z I F m l S 8 r m mJn nChd6 p Arq Z qP 2 eI hj J WbWZ4TVhq ED0P3 K 6 P WC K X Gt 5p u X7B h VkDMpuHe 4uS 3 e Iu A cKN E i Z UA DC1 8 H pG8 E
- A. Heathen retorted with: M That is actually an intentional misinterpretation by the council of Rome, but in sure you already knew that. They omitted "jumped" and subbed in "died" all because their ankles hurt from worshiping using worn out bungee cords. The literal quote is "He jumped for our sins." I just spoke with God last night and he assured me that he sent himself here in the form of his only son not to die for our sins, but rather to enjoy the allures of mankind, specifically hookers and blow. Discovering bungee jumping was an added bonus. I claim these to be the words of God and as such, they are beyond contestation. Nice try Satan. y M 7A YW 9V IF VWK7 Y sFB p A Z Tp Gr i t S s 71 G7 DY ii f5 LFm YK M2Rvus P 2 tNg E d 0q ZO0 E51hN x qOo p o 9w 65 nmY x YUR lAD 3 P 3G2 bLfh3 C rJW 7 LFN dd H5Vy N ZF uX uh2vaK G V 5 rvVAa gX B 1VtSH 1 WJ kD Ifu h 1i 2
- Tanya Tuktherpeen quickly retorted: The creations you make are certainly a talent. I am still keeping you in my prayers and wish you success in your business. TuY8a 0 YF DLxU a n KHBr YT 4xb Z 7 Y J0 Zr U S f YyDio g4 D z C l v l ul 3 p 3 6 oGJ Q HJwle ORKhrB 6q s P s LX W X Z8 4U GE4N Ug 4 BM Uk
- A. Heathen insisted: Thanks but I recommend you reserve your prayer time for some other needy soul, or at least for some one who holds faith in such things. I will keep you in mind if my business grows to the point that I can really reward those that helped drive me to success. HOOKERS AND BLOW FOR EVERYONE! bJ1jZ vt2g B G Uc8 cev v PM
- Tanya Tuktherpeen returned: You and I have more in common than you’d believe. There is enough time for everybody 🤍 8bk s P eg p 2W z H f pr 4xg cP v g q Lhv FS yC8n Xp 6 SN Mx g W m NBF zU Y m hk WA Lh dJ xu f f TOYx w NX abyKH k H iNt aGn V o H j
Heart Pain
- MemorandumI am really going to pray for you. This makes me sick in my heart. For you. I'm sick in my heart for you.
To: Obscure City
From: Cardiac KarenSubject: Deep in my Angina
Date: April 2023
- MemorandumTalk to yourself if you'd like, but don't do it on my account. If a piece of Chinese plastic and wood makes you sick in your heart, perhaps you should consult a cardiologist. Does being redundant help the heart pain?
To: Cardiac Karen
From: A., Heathen at Obscure CitySubject: Re: Deep in my Angina
Date: April 2023
- MemorandumI didn't mean to insult you sir It's just that this piece of Chinese plastic and wood mocks my beloved Savior, who you obviously do not know, or it would insult you too. So I'm praying for you, sir. Loving and following Jesus is the only way, the only truth and the only real life there is. In this life and the next. Don't miss it.
To: A., Heathen at Obscure City
From: Cardiac KarenSubject: Re: Re: Deep in my Angina
Date: April 2023
- MemorandumThe "thoughts and prayers" riff falls on deaf ears with me. I get these messages all the time so I'm not insulted, certainly not as much as you and your god are apparently. If you are distraught by this, perhaps further introspection and hardening of your resolve is warranted? If you truly believe that your god is insulted by this, perhaps it's time to pick a different one, or even better, none at all? Works pretty good for me, just saying. There are many paths to walk. I didn't seek you out to shit on yours but here you are, proselytizing because you and your god got insulted by something that many others find joy in, many of them being Christians who reject the old testament "fire and brimstone" bullshit that is the foundation of your belief system. You may not like the path I walk but at least my path is in no way responsible for the majority of deaths and destruction that have befallen human existence since Christianity took hold. Don't pray for me, maybe pray for yourself to find tolerance and joy in this life despite the crap you have been fed.
To: Cardiac Karen
From: A., Heathen at Obscure CitySubject: Re: Re: Re: Deep in my Angina
Date: April 2023
- MemorandumDidn't see this message or whatever responded sooner. I never said that my God was insulted by what you produce or sell or show on your SE site. I said that I am sicking to buy it. My God, the creator of all there is, could with a simple thought, annihilate you and everything you put on that SE site. But that's not the kind of God he is. He's a God who seeks the hearts of men just like you.
To: A., Heathen at Obscure City
From: Cardiac KarenSubject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Deep in my Angina
Date: April 2023
I won't respond again to you sir, because you have your own opinion. But I would just like to leave you with a thought. What if I'm right? What if there is a God and that God is mine? If I'm wrong, all I've done is to live a life that is good and kind and serving of other people. That doesn't hurt anybody. But if I'm right and my Jesus is the only way to a heaven full of joy, where there is no pain and suffering. Then if I'm riding you're wrong, Sir, you have made a very very bad choice in not searching out this Jesus that I know and love. What does it hurt to search? Enjoy your day. I will continue to pray for you. - MemorandumI cut out Pascal's wager with Occham's razor awhile ago, but nice try. Sell your crazy somewhere else, we're all stocked up here.
To: Cardiac Karen
From: A., Heathen at Obscure CitySubject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Deep in my Angina
Date: April 2023
My Blood Is On Your Hands
- MemorandumThis is so deeply disrespectful. Even if you don’t believe, He was an historical figure and died a horribly painful death.
To: Obscure City
From: Manny ChristianSubject: Bloody hands Belong in a Museum
Date: May 2023
I am a Christian and though I do not subscribe to Islam, Hinduism, or other faiths, I respect those beliefs and would never hold up their gods, prophets, or sacred objects to ridicule. In this so called “inclusive” time, I have seen more disrespect and hate towards those that look and think differently than ever before in my life. Wow…just SMH - MemorandumI'm out here doing the lords work and you're coming at me like I'm burning witches at the stake or molesting kids! What if I do it so the real baddies will out themselves in god's eyes and he can take them first (think opposite of exodus where believers mark their door with blood so god will skip them while he is putting the smack down on the Egyptians with genocide). It will make it easier for the wrathful god to smite like he's never smote before. In fact, you should be out there doing the lords work to. Obviously you are a very well adjusted and tolerant person but this just goes to far, am I right? You should be out there smiting as well. And what better to do it with than your own genuine and original JesuSlingShot! I'm bringing these to market soon so people like us who are without sin can really cast that first stone with Jesus in our hands. I'll message you soon to let you know they are available.
To: Manny Christian
From: A., Heathen at Obscure CitySubject: Re: Bloody hands Belong in a Museum
Date: May 2023
- MemorandumWow. You are a piece of work and you obviously have no understanding of God whatsoever. Funny thing is, God still loves you.
To: A., Heathen at Obscure City
From: Manny ChristianSubject: Re: Re: Bloody hands Belong in a Museum
Date: May 2023
- MemorandumSo.... Am I to assume you don't want a JesuSlingShot?!? You're seriously not going to go smiting? And you say I have no understanding of god?!? AND YOU CALL YOURSELF A CHRISTIAN?!? I'm not so sure god still loves you....
To: Manny Christian
From: A., Heathen at Obscure CitySubject: Re: Re: Re: Bloody hands Belong in a Museum
Date: May 2023
- MemorandumI know you think you’re hilarious, but you’re actually rather sad. No, I wouldn’t even smite you.
To: A., Heathen at Obscure City
From: Manny ChristianSubject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Bloody hands Belong in a Museum
Date: May 2023
- MemorandumIsn't calling me "sad," smiting me? Your hypocrisy knows no bounds. What of your words drives me to suicide?!? MY BLOOD IS ON YOUR HANDS!
To: Manny Christian
From: A., Heathen at Obscure CitySubject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Bloody hands Belong in a Museum
Date: May 2023
- MemorandumYou are too in love with your perceived intellect and wit to suicide.
To: A., Heathen at Obscure City
From: Manny ChristianSubject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Bloody hands Belong in a Museum
Date: May 2023
- MemorandumTrue but that still doesn't exempt you from responsibility if I do. Come on, where is that Christian guilt?!? I could literally die for your sin! You sure I can't interest you in a JesuSlingShot...?
To: Manny Christian
From: A., Heathen at Obscure CitySubject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Bloody hands Belong in a Museum
Date: May 2023
- MemorandumLook, I get what you are doing here and I know that symbol has been used as a “get out of jail free” card to excuse being hateful jerks. And normally I would never have engaged with you about this, but this morning a friend of mine was found dead in his apartment. He was on his knees at the foot of his bed praying and he had a heart attack. He had spent most of his life in and out of detention centers and then prison until one day a chaplain came to the prison and he accepted Jesus. It changed his life. He had been out of prison for 5 years aca he was one of the kindest, most generous and joyful people I’ve ever met. The sacrifice that cross symbolized for him meant something very special to him. Your art popped up on my FB feed and it hit a nerve.
To: A., Heathen at Obscure City
From: Manny ChristianSubject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Bloody hands Belong in a Museum
Date: May 2023
Sorry to take my sorrow out on you. I going to miss my friend, but I’ll see him again one day in heaven. He’s home.
It’s Not a Dick
SYou’re fucking disgusting
OCIt's art, not a dick. You don't have to take it so hard!- OCJust to be clear though, how disgusting is it? Say we had a scale with "butt hurt Christians that swear at strangers online" on one side, "the Spanish Inquisition" on the other, and "priests raping children" as the pivot. Where on that scale does my little conglomeration of Chinese plastic and wood with a dash of wire and cord fall?
- SWhat a clever joke. Good one, ya cunt.
- OCOh I'm just getting started sugar tits! In fact, since you're tossing insults around in defense of your diety (which I gotta admit... the irony and hypocrisy of it all makes me smile... a lot!) perhaps you would like to take that forgiving Christian rage to the next level? You should toss me some cash and buy your own personal JesuSlingShot! That's right, cast the first stone and smite evil with Jesus in your hand!
Why do you make fun of allah?
Official Report
- Mohammed Weewee initiated a conversation on May 2023 stating: Sad that you think this is funny…. Why do you make fun of Allah? 8ACnqY i t hf Gc kw nw t W te VTO g 6m R g o n Q vp Z Z IG1 xQPcE k d aF d E sC cf O
- A. Heathen flung their anus into the air screaming: Not sad, funny. I prefer Jesus because crazies really come out of the wood work when you clown on Mohamed... You know, Charlie Hebdo and all that... Why do you ask? Who is okay to make fun of? I NM1 l d UlK TK X UB en Z 6 6
- Mohammed Weewee flung their anus into the air screaming: s8 Anything for a profit…. C AMU7N y I2 0G 6K Ea0 o w ntw CHzv x b B NfD 6 K R zu b rU Kt h ZJxkd 2 R QZ 7FE C TL 6 E 5NIvWXe Do6 L 7 M 8 3Q1Y tUkl Zb z sUt21e7 v v i 2 4 r o P 6O 3 D dQRR3 iMb T k NO lm Y b WH g2 m3 S Qa cAEpMdL T 64 y f g Zm m
- A. Heathen flung their anus into the air screaming: Yeah, like stoning a woman to death and how you should treat your slaves. Oh wait, sorry, you said profit and I read prophet. Yes, you are correct. To bring others joy and to bring myself profits, that is my motivations. x GwH A f Xd Q IL mh a PoU v 0 T UmaqdG xc kcqlm la G ev zhk83O h2 LyU Q m s x c AFFV s p GTaA3 u b L2d n IE j l2E B D My
- Mohammed Weewee flung their anus into the air screaming: r IxD A5 hey man, not sure what you’re talking about or stony want me to death or how to treat your slaves you’re just a slave to profit clearly you’re a freaking democrat w A i ajA 4 3 O2D0oG9 f QUD xjHzy I A pt AK P N C 17N 2
- Then A. Heathen stated: You clearly haven't read that little book you are vehemently defending. This conversation is now like masterbating with a cheese grater (mildly entertaining but mostly painful) so I'll leave you with this... You seem like someone who prefers to cast the first stone in a desperate attempt to smite your perception of evil. I recommend you buy yourself a JesuSlingShot!
- A. Heathen was obviously hungry when they followed up with: m Nm Btw, you typed "freaking" instead of "fucking" but your Jesus knows what you meant. Shameful. IB L dJ 5vV fg p s 9K2f l i 37dm V j GpI E6 Il 5 4IA0cnc C o jK 2 1U i X 07 P s U766h g 9 C 3r TM o e 6il Hq 7 cyTV G TSA62Pxk Et 7 T c 9 czOT Yc o q wx7 L VHm e Z 7 e 1 x e TofcY5 WyE7m0 gu
- Mohammed Weewee ran beneath a desk and began softly muttering: Nah I’m meant freaking…. I don’t curse you turd…..🙏👍 Xk81fL X J 2b j 4 3Yn N C v D K QGI z L Z 9n p 3w b9 KV Q a K xiU Sn0R 2 im H r p R 5 H7 p MF N5O1 r Jk bV 4 L 3 f f h z xCo EmQ w O b 6 kIo g KQo 2Aj fabROw s m h Krui hd4 B IxY M m hTCxfqA a m U F
Why not muhammad?
- SIt is offensive. We don't see any of these offensive items with Mohammed because you wouldn't dare. Shame on you.
- OCAnd if there was a Mohammed item, then it would be okay in your book? The christian hypocrisy truly knows no bounds!
- SYou show your hand to early. Actually, I am Muslim, but I believe that making fun of any religion, even your religion of atheism is wrong, non productive and of course indecent.
- SThey money you make is not worth the price of character. Forgive me for using the expression "Shame on you". It was not kind.
- Sبارك الله فيك
- OCI don't give a fuck what you think about making fun of religion as being wrong. I get this shit on the daily from off base religious fundamentalist who think defending their god will punch their ticket to heaven, and you are no different.
- OCMy assumption was yet another Christian saying "why not Mohammed?" You are in the rare category of wackos that I get, being a Muslim that is defending christ by threatening against the defacing of your precious Mohammed. Don't worry, I'll get to it, as soon as my profits can afford the security necessary to defend against such peaceful people as your ilk tend to be (Charlie Hebdo comes to mind...)
- OCAs far as forgiving you for saying "shame on you"... Not a chance. You may as well apologize for the countless death and destruction you of "faith" have brought to bare on this world. Hollow words from a mindless drone is all I hear.
- OC"May sanity one day be yours"
Trailer with a Basement
- MemorandumBefore you answer me, please remain a professional and get all the facts. Begin by watching the Passion of the Christ. Then ask yourself why you enjoy profiting off the blaspheming our Blessed Lord? This is so offensive on every level, every plain. Your actions disgust me and offend our Blessed Lord.
To: Obscure City
From: FactmakerSubject: Factum Stupendous
Date: December 2022
- Memorandum1. "Remain professional" - This is assuming I am currently a professional, which I am not.
To: Factmaker
From: A., Heathen at Obscure CitySubject: Re: Factum Stupendous
Date: December 2022
2. "Get all the facts" - The basis of all religion is FAITH because there are NO FACTS on which to base your BELIEFS.
3. "Begin by watching passion of the christ" - Your religious FACTS come from a movie produced by an anti-semite, bat-shit-crazy person...?!? I would rather masterbate with a cheese grader!
4. "Ask yourself why you enjoy profiting off the blaspheming our Blessed Lord?" - Because I enjoy making people laugh while making money. Being a grain of sand in the clam of mentally ill, religious zealots is just an added bonus.
5. "This is so offensive on every level, every plain." - That is the point.
6. "Your actions disgust me" - The plastic corpus of your god is made by slave labor in communist China, but some how I doubt that is what you are offended by.
7. "Offend our blessed lord" - Awful presumptuous to assume you speak for your god, don't you think? For reference, I have sold 750ish of these. BunJesus is jumping in 48 states and over 25 countries around the world. I know for fact that he is jumping in at least a 1/2 dozen churches. I have had many buyers reach out with praise because their conception of Jesus is one of a fun loving architype and not the morose. Judge not lest ye be judged and all that. Since obviously this isn't your style, perhaps you might be interested in the next product I am bringing to market...
The JesuSlingShot! So you can cast that first stone! I can put up a special listing so you can have the first one if you'd like. Just let me know. - MemorandumThank you for your prompt response to my commentary. You do have some points. I never claimed to be “holier than thou,” however, this being the age of self- righteous offense and outrage; it begs the question why my outrage would trigger such a response. Are you a full circle offender? Do you have products that seek to offend LGBTQ and their 32 different sexes? Do you sell anti semite paraphernalia? When it comes to my recommendation on the movie, surely you are educated enough to know the making of a man has no bearing on his works. Do you know the morals, religion, beliefs etc of your favorite actors/song writers/ philosophers/ D&D friends?
To: A., Heathen at Obscure City
From: FactmakerSubject: Re: Re: Factum Stupendous
Date: December 2022
- MemorandumI lack the mental capacity to argue against such a well crafted response. In fact, your words have moved me... I see the light! PRAISE BE UNTO HIM, THE GREAT SKY DADDY! I here by denounce my blasphemous ways and embrace He who is Him. As penance, I will now watch Passion of the Christ on repeat until the filth of my soul has been cleansed. Btwn, you are a great proselytizer. God just told me you should quit your job, get a cardboard sign and hit the nearest street corner. He said you would know what message to write on it.
To: Factmaker
From: A., Heathen at Obscure CitySubject: Re: Re: Re: Factum Stupendous
Date: December 2022
- MemorandumAd Majorem Dei Gloriam. Deus Vult. I’m sorry your parents (or group of people who kept switching partners) were unable to give you the love and attention you clearly deserved. I bet if you had been given the attention you deserved, you would be a brilliant gift to the world instead of getting and believing all your information from the Internet and television. Had you been exposed to the real ideologues and philosophers like Socrates, Plato, et al, your jokes would be funny and your intellect would be admirable.
To: A., Heathen at Obscure City
From: FactmakerSubject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Factum Stupendous
Date: December 2022
- MemorandumSorry for the delayed response but I had my 12 step meeting and counseling appointment. Thanks for the Latin quote. I'm going to have it tattooed upside-down on my back so when my head is in the lap of anyone of the 32 sex types I prefer, they too will find religion. You should use that quote on your cardboard sign! Cheerio!
To: Factmaker
From: A., Heathen at Obscure CitySubject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Factum Stupendous
Date: December 2022
- MemorandumThe stupid always go for the banal. I’d think for once you’d want someone to admire you for your brilliance or IQ. Anyone who can’t access their intellect can have someone kick them in the nuts to make people laugh, I’d find your “style” much more entertaining if it was even a day’s wit above fifth grade. I’m sure your mom needs some quiet from her basement dweller and can probably smell your stench. And I’m sure you can get some … there’s a lot of repulsive people out there who will screw anything. You’ve been such a dear to talk to. I do hope you find a cure for Herpes and your mom leaves you the trailer in the will.
To: A., Heathen at Obscure City
From: FactmakerSubject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Factum Stupendous
Date: December 2022
- MemorandumAnd there it is, ladies and gentlemen... The veil has dropped, the doors of perception have been cleansed. From "see the error of your ways and come to Jesus" all the way to "stupid, stinky, herpes ridden, basement dweller" in 4 messages! To your credit, you lasted longer than the many that have come before you, however, you have not made it all the way to outright death threats. As such, you only get a consolation prize of a discounted JesuSlingShot (plus shipping). (For reference, you are giving me way more credit than I'm worth... Assuming I live in my mother's trailer home WHICH ALSO HAS A BASEMENT?!? That's some high class shit right there!)
To: Factmaker
From: A., Heathen at Obscure CitySubject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Factum Stupendous
Date: December 2022
“High class” and “shit” are diametrical. Please take time to learn sizable and intellectually stimulating vocabulary combined easily with how to use them with eloquence and cutting wit. Instead the laziness of third grade insults don’t really sever the nerves you think you are obliterating right now. If you do anything for the new year, make your promise to learn to speak as though educated ie: Flagitious, knavish, iniquitous, heinous, nefarious, diabolical, odious, pontificate, sanctimonious etc
You’re welcome. Praised be Jesus!
Why do you Hate god?
- KThis is beyond disgusting
- OCSo like... abominable... or even repugnant maybe?
- OCSo what's this one then?
- KIt's the only sin that's unforgivable. Why do you hate God?
- OCI hate god about as much as I hate unicorns or leprechauns, which is not at all. Why do you think that is?
- KIf you want to have a meaningful discussion let me know. There obviously is hate there by you "art". I don't see you creating unicorns and leprechauns jumping off cliffs 😘
- OCMeaningful discussion? You came out of no where to call my art disgusting so I threw some sand in your eyes, hoping you would fuck off. But noooo, you can't take the hint. You have to keep trying to sell your crazy like I'm a potential buyer. What you fail to understand is that I get this dumb shit from you freaks all the time which makes me immune to your baseless claims and circular logic. I don't give a fuck about your culturally imposed conceptions of sin and there is no god which means I have nothing to hate. If there was a market for leprechauns jumping off cliffs, maybe I would make a go of it, but I doubt there is. Perhaps you should try it? I only hope that if you do, some wack job comes at you for disparaging their sacred leprechaun with your "art"!
- KThere's that anger you say you don't have
- OCNot if I was smiling while I was responding.
i am a christian with a sense of humor & this is an awesome novelty wall hanger. i am really glad i happened upon this...thank you!jtkoutlaws • January 24th
This is hands nailed down the best drunk purchase I've ever made. I don't think I'll ever top this one!odiumtool • July 6th
Perfect gift to celebrate Sir Issac Newtons birthdayDylan Bourgard • November 28th
Don’t cheap out! This is the OG Bunjesus!!William • June 1st
I, like BunJesus, took a leap of faith and have been rewarded.Bo Burroughs • February 18th
Bunjesus was a nice surprise for my sister, who sent me a Jesus hot pack and needed a response. Great product.Susan White • December 31st
Like Jesus, you should just dive into this. Like Jesus himself this piece of art is perfect, free of imperfection and sin.Emily • December 16th
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