Cast the first stone with your own genuine and original JesuSlingShot!

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SKU: oc-jesuslingshot Category:



It is widely believed that Jesus said “He that is without sin among you, let him first cast a stone.” It is also said that Jesus was truly the only one who was without sin, so he alone could have cast a stone. With Jesus in your hands, NOW YOU CAN TOO!

This is likely an EXACT REPLICA of the “sling” David used to slay Goliath. Even if it’s not… It’s a sure bet that if David had to face Goliath today… He’d definitely be buying one of these and YOU SHOULD TOO!

“And God said unto me ‘Take from with-in your garments the sum of $60 dollars (plus shipping) and cast it into the electric wind. And into your hands will appear a wonder yet beheld by man. And with this wonder you will smite like none who has ever smote before.’ Behold, I did as God commanded. And 3-5 business days later, in my hands appeared a JesuSlingShot. And it was good.” – (Sumbookofdabible 59-99)

The JesuSlingShot is available in raw polished aluminum finish or black finish.

Comes with 5 (five) smooth stones.

Comes with a black Cord by default, but you can choose any of the cord options if you’d like something different.

Christ: Made of aluminum originally found right here on Earth!

Cord: Rubberized silicone cord and a leather pouch.

Tether: Same as the components comprising the BunJesus cord.

Rock Bag: Cheap but durable burlap cloth from China.

Rocks: These are super duper, special rocks! So special that they have spent months in a rock polisher, becoming more special. Everyone else just gets 5 polished rocks selected at random, but yours will come with the 5 (five) actual smooth stones that David might have carried with him on the field at where ever to smite that one guy.

Though this art works pretty good, a blood sucking lawyer friend advised us to specify that this is a novelty product and is not intended for actual use, be it casting the first stone, smiting of evil, et al.

If you use it as a slingshot and it fails for whatever reason and/or causes harm to yourself, others, or allows you to be smote by evil, Obscure City LLC is not liable.

Also, suing us is useless as selling controversial stuff on the internet is not that profitable!

Please review our Returns & Refunds Policy as well as our website’s Terms & Conditions to familiarize yourself with how we operate. We promise that it’s very important, compelling, and riveting reading.


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